By David Dorman, Broker Associate, CENTURY 21 Carioti
I’ve been selling real estate since 1999, and if there’s one thing that continues to amaze me about this industry, it’s how many agents are still doing things simply because that’s how they were taught.
Not because the technique is particularly effective. Not because they’ve evaluated whether it still works. And certainly not because they’ve considered whether there’s a better way.
It’s simply because that’s how it’s always been done.
And quite frankly, that drives me a little crazy.
Now, don’t misunderstand me. There are certain things in real estate that are tried and true. Good communication, honesty, preparation, knowing your market, and understanding how to negotiate on behalf of your client will never go out of style.
But there’s a big difference between respecting experience and blindly repeating habits.
What worked in 1999 doesn’t necessarily work in 2026. And just because another agent taught you something 15 years ago doesn’t mean you should still be doing it today.
Are We Negotiating, or Just Going Through the Motions?
One of my biggest frustrations is watching agents confuse asking questions with actually negotiating.
You know the questions I’m talking about.
“How motivated is your seller?”
“Where is the seller moving?”
“Why are they selling?”
“What’s the lowest price they’ll take?”
These are questions that agents have been taught to ask for decades. And somewhere along the way, they became part of the standard real estate playbook.
But here’s my question: What exactly are you expecting to accomplish?
Do you honestly believe that a good listing agent is going to tell you something that puts their seller at a disadvantage?
If I’m representing a seller, my job is to protect their interests. I’m not going to reveal confidential information about their circumstances, financial position, or negotiating flexibility just because another agent asks.
And frankly, any agent who willingly gives away information that could weaken their client’s negotiating position needs to reconsider whose interests they’re representing.
That’s not negotiation. That’s fishing for information and hoping someone makes a mistake.
Real negotiation requires understanding the property, the market, the terms of the transaction, and what matters to the people involved.
It requires strategy.
Sometimes the price isn’t even the most important part of the conversation. Closing dates, contingencies, financing, inspection terms, and certainty of closing can all influence how an offer is received.
But you have to understand the transaction well enough to recognize those opportunities.
Simply asking, “How low will they go?” isn’t a strategy.
The Obsession With Showing Feedback
Here’s another one that gets under my skin.
Showing feedback.
Let me start by saying that I understand why sellers want feedback. When someone walks through your home, you’re naturally curious about what they thought.
And as a listing agent, I absolutely want to know whether there’s something useful I can learn from a showing.
But there’s a point where this becomes ridiculous.
Just yesterday, I showed ten condominiums to a buyer. Afterward, I took the time to go into the showing system and provide feedback indicating that my client wasn’t interested.
You would think that would be sufficient.
Apparently not.
I started getting calls from agents wanting more information. Why weren’t they interested? What didn’t they like? Was there something that could be done?
And here’s the part that makes this especially frustrating: These weren’t brand-new listings. These properties had already been sitting on the market for a significant amount of time.
At some point, how much more feedback do you really need?
If a property has been listed for three or four months without selling, the market has already been giving you feedback every single day.
The lack of offers is feedback.
The lack of showings is feedback.
Buyers choosing competing properties is feedback.
And while there can certainly be exceptions, if a property has been properly exposed to the market and buyers consistently aren’t responding, there’s a very good chance that price, condition, presentation, or some combination of those factors is the issue.
Calling the tenth buyer’s agent to ask why their client didn’t like the property probably isn’t going to solve the problem.
And it certainly isn’t going to change that buyer’s mind.
What Are You Actually Going to Do With the Feedback?
This is the question I wish more agents would ask themselves.
Let’s say I tell you that my buyer thought the condominium was outdated, the floor plan didn’t work, or the asking price was too high.
Now what?
Are you prepared to have that conversation with your seller?
Do you have the relationship with your client that allows you to deliver uncomfortable information?
Do you have a plan for making adjustments?
Because collecting feedback is meaningless if you’re not prepared to do something with it.
One of the most important skills a listing agent can develop is the ability to have honest conversations with sellers.
And sometimes those conversations aren’t particularly pleasant.
Nobody wants to hear that their home is overpriced.
Nobody wants to hear that buyers don’t appreciate their decorating choices.
And nobody wants to hear that the market isn’t responding the way they expected.
But that’s exactly why they hired a professional.
If all you’re going to do is tell people what they want to hear, what value are you really bringing to the transaction?
A Price Adjustment Doesn’t Mean You Failed
I’ve always looked at pricing a little differently.
When I recommend a listing price, it’s based on my experience, market research, the competition, and what I believe the property can realistically achieve.
But ultimately, the market has the final say.
If we’ve given a property proper exposure and the response tells us we need to make an adjustment, I don’t automatically consider that a failure.
In fact, I often look at it as a positive.
Why?
Because it tells me we tested the market rather than immediately accepting less than we believed the property might bring.
We didn’t necessarily leave money on the table.
Now, that doesn’t mean I believe in deliberately overpricing homes. Quite the opposite. An unrealistic asking price can cost a seller valuable time and momentum.
But there’s a difference between thoughtful pricing that needs refinement and an agent who simply refuses to acknowledge what the market is telling them.
I’ve had sellers who needed time to understand that distinction. That’s where communication, trust, and a solid marketing plan become so important.
The job isn’t to promise a seller whatever price they want.
The job is to help them make informed decisions, even when those decisions are difficult.
Open Houses, Postcards, and Other Real Estate Traditions
And negotiation isn’t the only area where this mentality exists.
Think about all the things real estate agents continue to do simply because somebody told them that’s what successful agents do.
Open houses are a perfect example.
Can an open house help sell a property? Absolutely.
Can it create opportunities to meet prospective buyers? Of course.
But is holding an open house every weekend automatically an effective marketing strategy?
Not necessarily.
The same goes for postcards.
Years ago, print advertising was one of the primary ways we reached consumers. Then the internet changed everything. Social media changed it again.
And interestingly enough, some forms of print marketing have become useful again because physical mail can stand out in a world dominated by digital communication.
But sending one or two postcards and expecting a flood of business?
That’s not much of a strategy.
The point isn’t that traditional marketing is bad.
It’s that you should understand why you’re doing something, who you’re trying to reach, and how you’re going to measure whether it’s working.
Otherwise, you’re just spending money because somebody told you to.
And Can We Talk About Closing Gifts?
Here’s one that’s probably going to irritate a few agents.
Elaborate closing gifts.
I’ve never completely understood the obsession.
A seller hires you to sell their home. You successfully complete the transaction, earn your commission, and then feel obligated to give some of that money back in the form of an expensive gift basket, personalized cutting board, or something else that may end up collecting dust in a cabinet.
Why?
I’m not against showing appreciation. Far from it.
I send thank-you notes. I believe in acknowledging the relationship, and there are certainly times when a thoughtful gift is appropriate.
But I’ve watched agents go completely overboard with closing gifts, almost as though the gift is going to guarantee another transaction.
It won’t.
And if the transaction didn’t go particularly well, I seriously doubt an expensive basket is going to change how that client remembers the experience.
What makes a lasting impression is how you treated someone throughout the process.
Did you return their calls?
Did you tell them the truth?
Did you protect their interests?
Did you solve problems when things got difficult?
Were you there when they needed you?
Those are the things people remember.
Not necessarily the bottle of champagne or the fancy cheese assortment.
Want Repeat Business? Stay in Touch.
If agents took some of the money and energy they spend on elaborate closing gifts and invested it in genuine, consistent follow-up, I think they’d see a much better return.
Send a useful newsletter.
Check in with past clients.
Provide meaningful market updates.
Be available when they have questions about their home.
Make sure they know you’re still actively working in real estate.
And most importantly, maintain the relationship without making every interaction feel like a sales pitch.
Because the goal isn’t to impress someone for five minutes at the closing table.
The goal is to be the person they remember five years later when they’re ready to buy or sell again.
Or when a friend, neighbor, or family member asks if they know a good real estate agent.
That’s how you build a lasting business.
Not with a gift basket.
Experience Should Teach You to Evolve
When I started selling real estate in 1999, the business looked dramatically different.
We marketed homes differently.
Buyers found properties differently.
We communicated differently.
And the amount of information available to consumers was nowhere near what it is today.
If I were still doing everything exactly the way I was trained back then, I wouldn’t be doing my clients any favors.
Experience isn’t valuable simply because you’ve been doing something for a long time.
Experience becomes valuable when you learn from what works, recognize what doesn’t, and have the willingness to change.
And that brings me back to negotiation.
The best negotiators aren’t necessarily the ones asking the most questions, making the most phone calls, or repeating the same scripts they’ve used for twenty years.
They’re the ones who understand the situation, listen carefully, recognize opportunities, protect their client’s interests, and know when to speak and when to remain quiet.
Sometimes the smartest negotiation is the one where you don’t reveal everything you know.
Sometimes it’s recognizing that the other side has already given you the information you need.
And sometimes it’s simply having the confidence to stop doing something that no longer serves a purpose.
The Bottom Line
If you’re interviewing a real estate agent, here’s a question I’d encourage you to ask:
“Why do you do things the way you do?”
And then listen carefully to the answer.
If the response is, “Because that’s how I’ve always done it,” I’d probably have a few more questions.
After more than 27 years in this business, I’m still learning. I’m still adjusting. And I’m certainly not afraid to question practices that no longer make sense.
Because my responsibility isn’t to preserve real estate traditions.
It’s to do what’s best for the people who trust me with one of the largest financial transactions of their lives.
And that’s something that should never change.
David Dorman
Broker Associate | CENTURY 21 Carioti
407-948-8295
david@daviddorman.com
www.DavidDorman.com
When you hire David Dorman you GET David Dorman.